Monday, August 4, 2014

Jiemeimen he Dixiongmen HAO!

I'm almost, yeah get this, ALMOST 1/3 of the way through here!! Wow the MTC is a long stay..

I decided I dont necessarily have yellow fever yet, but I am DYING to have an Asian body! Elder Sng from the zone does these dope pushups where his whole body comes off the ground a foot and he can do like 20 or 30 in a row!! I tried them and I am also capable of doing them although his little ninja build would be prime for it because they are all tiny balls (no pun intended bahahah) of muscle and probably dont have to work to build up all those lanky muscles that us taller people do. also i think i might take up taichi and kungfu in the field because I think my calling in life is to simultaneously fight crime and share the gospel. hopefully elder rigby feels the same so we can be sidekicks and partners in crime hahah with his jujitzu or whatever them hondurans do..

The district's science experiment is coming along fantastically. We have had 4 or 5 OJ bombs go off and I think we are on the verge of perfecting it so we can blow up some classrooms around this prison. I think the walls would look much better orange than drab white. 

Speaking of classrooms, Chinese class is the equivalent of 3 bottles of whiskey, itll knock you out cold and you wake up with the worst hangovers. I thought it was a joke that you get more tired than ever before in the MTC but turns out thats actually accurate! So Robinson Wheeler and I have taken up running 2 or so laps outside around the building every water break except when the tongban (comp) gets demanding that I stay in the building. then I run stairs haha. So improvisation is very important around this place for sanity.

Mom Dad as I tell you this story remember I'm a smart 4.0 kid. But sometimes my dumber side shines through. I was complaining about how tired I always was during break one of those days. So of course Wheeler and Elliot decide to play with me a bit. According to them, getting slapped across the face is the equivalent of 12 cups of coffee and will wake you up for up to 3 or so hours. I'm thinking "yes! if that works then this is fantastic because I have the hardest time staying awake!!" but I guess it just didnt cross my mind that getting back handed isnt exactly a pleasant feeling. So i voluntarily let Wheeler, the huge army dude that benches 900lbs, smack me soo hard across the face I almost cried!!! and worst yet right when I sat back down in class my eyes got heavy again but my face was throbbing too much to sleep so maybe thats how its supposed to work? for like an hour half of my face was bright red and the other side normal so some of the sisters had to take my pic.. (But really they just wanted pics of me because I'm so good looking ;) an inside joke we have going since elders and sisters arent supposed to flirt hahah) 

Dont let anyone tell you if you need a wake up call then to let them back hand you across the cheek it doesnt work.

Besides that little prank, I actually love Wheeler. We have explored just about every custodial closet around this place for the 'works'. But unfortunately the MTC is smarter than to have works cleaner just hanging around this place so we settled for a less reactive chemical that wheeler still thought would work. So we attempted 5 or so works bombs but none of them ever blew although they got to be like a 1000 degrees and just melted the bottles. So we turned to Elliot. I'm not kidding when i say hes the smartest kid I've ever met. During study time again he drew out the entire chemical equation of the reaction and solved it for the class and found that it only produces some metal and heat, not any gas and thats why the bomb didnt go off ever. We learn a lot more than just chinese around this place thats for sure!

But the most epic of all this week was FRUIT NINJA!! Wheeler carries around this hugeA knife everywhere he goes so we decided to be little ninjas and quietly stole a couple arms full of fruit from the cafeteria and we killed it! I got down some knifing techniques whilst obliterating those poor bananas. it was the dopest of dope. Vaughn even got into it and wrecked an apple. for those who dont know, fruit ninja is where you toss fruit into the air at someone with a knife and they slice it midair. its basically the funnest game I highly recommend it if youre feeling reckless hahah. Lisa this will be the perfect game for me to teach your little samurai when he's two right? hahaha. or Annipants and tess, i think they'd also get a kick out of it too!

So for my spiritual update so you dont think I'm a terrible missionary like I make myself sound like. We do role play teaching in class with the other chuanjiaoshis (missionaries). TanLaoshi one of our teachers suggested to me a while ago that I ought to try to implement personal experiences in my lessons to invite the spirit. So sister Jenkins played the role of being too scared to get baptized for fear of being disowned by her family. So i came in with the kill shot and shared Grandma Ott's story of being disowned for joining back in arkansas. All of it was in Chinese, (which was sick) but as I was telling this story for the 800th time in my life I felt so uplifted this time for some reason. Sister Jenkins cried. and the others were silent. role playing in chinese.. who would've thought it worked. That made me so excited to be a missionary. to share that peaceful message that all will be well in the end. missions rock.

Thanks for all the emails and letters you all are amazing. Mom keep sending me those emails if anyone ever wants theirs added to the list. tell the animals I'm very excited for my crazy random package! I miss those 5 and one on the way. keep making babies, siblings, theyre all so wonderful haha. Love you all and hope you enjoy life to its fullest and make the best of everything. 

Jin ZhangLao
Elder Jensen

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